Description

This looks good. The 30day program is a mission program (as archer sloan stuff and the like)first 70 pages of shyness theory stuff, 70 pages of nlp confidence-exercises, last 150 pages are about the missions. small part of the shyness-theory:Bottom line: Confidence is a matter of being sure of yourselfand self-esteem is a matter of liking yourself.Here’s a quick example to demonstrate the difference betweenconfidence and self-esteem to make sure you’re totallyclear about this. Jack is learning how to playgolf. He’s never played in his whole life. He’s never even helda golf club or hit a golf ball, not even miniature golf. But, Jackis learning to play golf. After his first lesson, Jack realizes thatgolf is a pretty tough game to master. It looked so easy to justhit a little ball around, but when he tried it for himself he foundout that it takes a lot of skill. Jack’s realized it’s going to takea lot of practice to be able to play golf with his friends. Jack’sconfidence is his ability to play golf is at an all-time low. Basedon his first lesson, he’s not at all certain that he’ll ever be ableto play a round of golf with his friends. But, Jack likes himselfjust fine. Jack’s self-esteem is nice and high. Just because hecan’t play golf yet, that doesn’t affect how he feels about himself.He likes himself just fine even though he can’t play golf.As you can see, self-esteem and confidence are not onlynot the same thing, but they can also operate independentlyof each other. The reason why people confuse confidence andself-esteem is simple: They sometimes can have an affect oneach other. They can sometimes be related to and affect eachother.Why is it important for you to understand the differencebetween confidence and self-esteem? It’s important because ifyou want more confidence, then you need a strategy that willincrease your confidence, not your self-esteem. Otherwise, ifyou use a strategy to increase your self-esteem, you may ormay not experience an increase in confidence. Increasing yourself-esteem does not guarantee an increase in confidence. Likingyourself better does not always translate into feeling “moresure” of yourself. People who go to counseling or therapy oftenfind that in the end they like themselves better, but they don’treally have any more confidence than they did before theystarted with counseling or therapy. The really sad part is thatthen they often justify feeling better about themselves as beingenough, but what they really wanted was more confidence!If you want to increase your confidence, then don’t focus onliking yourself better. If you do that, you may find that you likeyourself just fine, but still lack the confidence with women youreally wanted in the first place!